Thursday, June 5, 2008

Being a girl isn't always fun

My bladder & I have a pretty symbiotic relationship. It tickles me, i pee. Ultrasound prep really fucks this up.

Instructions were to drink a crate full of water an hour and a half before said appointment. K, my bladder? Not very stretchy.
So i woke up at 7:30...and peed. It is just unnatural not to first thing. It goes against all my basic instincts. Plus i forgot i had an appt.
Booked for 8:30. I gulped a gallon of water & off I went. The technician put the goop on me & then the roller thingy (is this too technical?) & said in a scolding tone, "Your bladder is empty." Eeek, i hate being chastised.
sorry
It usually fills really quickly...
Nope, come back at 1. And this time finish drinking 2 bottles of water by 11:30 (said in a stern teacher voice looking over her glasses at me).

So i gets in my car & half-way to work (a 10 min drive), I almost peed my pants.
11:30 comes around, i funnelled 2 bottles of water.

I had to leave work at 12:30 because my bladder was going to burst. I couldn't talk, laugh or sit.
I walk in & beg them to take me right away, because peeing my pants in the waiting room might have embarrassed me a bit. At this point, I'm fantasizing, and not about sex.

She goops me up & puts the thingy on my belly & says "good job".
Aw... i think i blushed.

And no, i'm not pregnant! (fingers crossed)

This whole weekend it's supposta be 30 degrees, 38 with the humidex. Here in Canadia we always have to add that, cuz that's how we roll. That's about 100 in American. Sticky sweet.

9 comments:

Unknown said...

Well, keep up those Kegels. Wouldn't want you peeing your pants or anything.

Eve Grey said...

bwahaha! Good advice!

Jill said...

I always love the full bladder ultrasound... or any ultrasound for that matter (well not really, especially if they're vaginal)...

Hope all is OK down south!

OHmommy said...

I am the same way.... had 2 glasses of wine 2night and peed 13 times already.

Angel said...

peeing is good for you....but I'm glad that you were able to "hold it" so they could do the test!

Tara R. said...

Bladder like a tank! Maybe that's not a good thing, but I can hold my beer.

I wish it were 30 here in Florida... Fs not Cs.... that's how we roll. :D

Anonymous said...

I just ditched the family for the weekend. they're on the East Coast (90 and HUMID) and I'm in San Francisco - 70 and breezily beautiful.

I should feel guilty but I do NOT.

I also have a bladder the size of a peanut. And after birthing two kids the words "weak pelvic floor" are taking on an, um, urgent new relevance...

Momo Fali said...

I had a cyst they were "watching" and I had to do those full bladder ultrasounds every month for six months. It was torture!!

Soge shirts said...

Lol i'd like to pretend I can relate but I can't. Kudos on not wetting your pants.