Tuesday, June 3, 2008

You can save up to 3 lives

I attempted to donate blood tonight for the good of all mankind. I've tried 3 times before but was turned down due to piercing, antibiotics and...piercing. I was a bit nervous about the whole endeavour to be honest wich cha. Needles are not the issue. In fact, I somewhat enjoy watching the vials fill up with my dark red blood when i need a test. My bravery makes me feel tough ass. But i AM slightly averse to being tied down for 1/2 hour while a pint of blood is sucked out of me. It's not the blood, it's the confinement. It makes me NERVOUS kids!
So after we determined that I am not afflicted with:

  • Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (whew!)

  • Hepatitis

  • West Nile

  • AIDS

  • syphilis

And have not:

  • donated blood in Quebec before (huh?)

  • had any piercings or tatoos in the last 6 months

  • used a needle to inject illegal drugs into myself

  • taken money or drugs for sex, since 1977 (before that i was a mad slut)

  • been in jail for more than 48 hours in the past 12 months (thank god i was bailed out at the 11th hour)

  • haven't had sex with anyone whose done any of the above

And I am:

  • over 110 pounds (barely, jokes!),

  • not pregnant (whew times infinity)

  • between 17 & 71

  • not a male whose had sex with another male, since 1977 (wow, 1977 was a killer!)

They tested my hemoglobin. And whadda ya know? They pricked my finger and dropped it in copper sulphate & that little sucker didn't drop, which it would have had there been enough iron in my blood. So then they did some other more involved test & my blood failed that too. So rude. I needed to have a level of at least 125 & mine was 115. Bummer. I can't even try again for 56 days.

Shopping list:

liquid iron supplement

iron skillet



red meat (hopefully it doesn't give me CJD or this vicious cicle starts all over again)

Instead I bought a purse & two shirts to drown my good intentions in.

I'll go buy the other stuff tomorrow. Cuz right now? I gotta go pass out.

P.S I'm sorry for the gigantic & odd-spacing in this post. Blogger has gone mental again.


Huckdoll said...

Hahahah, this is why I love ya.

Does the photo have anything to do at all with the post or is it randomitity at it's greatest?

neutron said...

Maybe there's some really deep symbolic connection with the geese and sacrifice and giving blood. hmmm ... my bet is they just look really cute.

Beth said...

Blogger is always pissing around...

and I have 3 iron skillets that were my grandmother's and I cook in them all the time. I've never given blood. I know! I know!! I SHOULD! considering I'm o+....I dont ahve a problem with needles, I've just always been anemic! plus I have unprotected sex with all kind of gay guys all the time....that and my piercings...

Manager Mom said...

Eve, you are a better woman than I. I haven't even tried since college. I think I'm too afraid that if I DO give blood they'll test it for:

Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease (whew!)


West Nile



And tell me that I do, in fact, have ALL OF THE ABOVE.

Tammie Lee said...

oh my goooosh, you went through so much and you have me laughing, i looove your humor!

ConverseMomma said...

I'm totally lacking in iron. I'm suppose to take slow fe, but don't. I like living dangerously ;)